Disaster Movie

If you want to not laugh at a film, then
this is the one for you...  via comingsoon

Disaster Movie has a most apt title. The film is a complete and utter disaster from start to finish. By some way this is the worst film I have ever had this misfortune to watch. It's not even bad in a funny way (like Mega Shark Vs. Giant Octopus). It's just an unfunny, offensive piece of horseshit. No scratch that, horseshit is useful as fertiliser, make it chickenshit. These Amazon reviewers, however, are severely misguided and ought to seek counseling as fast as their dragging knuckles will let them:

First time I saw this film it had me in stitches (Why? Was it so awful that you threw yourself through a 3rd story window? I would've if I'd paid for it...). So I thought I have to buy it and have as a keep sake (A keep sake to remind you forever of the day you saw this tripe?). Laugh out loud stupid comedy (I didn't laugh at this film. Not once.). Great. (If you think this was 'great' then I pity you.)

Here's another moron who writes for our entertainment. I'm guessing this review is in reply to people (quite rightly) pointing out that the 'disaster' in Disaster Movie barely gets a look in...:

well i disagree with you both there was a disaster (Technically speaking you're correct, but at the same time, it doesn't actually make fun of disaster films very often. It doesn't even really make any attempt to parody the character tropes that are so prevalent in the disaster genre. It just makes fun of just about anything. For example, one of the main characters is a parody of Juno.) so the name applys and the spoof of all those movies was hilarious (Those movies not actually being disaster movies. Just movies in general...).Better then than superhero movie by far. (Actually, I have also seen Superhero Movie, and while not exactly The Godfather, it's not too bad. It's certainly twice the film of this fetid pile of excrement. It enjoys the distinct advantage of being actually funny in places. In no small part due to an actual focused attack on superhero movies.)

And another... (This is actually how it was set out. Someone should probably tell him not to hit 'enter' so much...:

i just watched this with my brother and 
honestly its the funniest thing i have ever seen (Really? The funniest thing? You poor mirthless sod.)
Like the other review states the sarcasm is 
excellent (especially teh sex and the city scene) (I fear sarcasm is far too high humour for this turd...)
It had me peeing it was so funny (When? When was it funny?) and it was on for a reasonable 
amount of time too (87 minutes. And you notice every single one. Dunbar would love this film... [any Catch-22 readers will get that. If you haven't read it, then trust me when I say my joke was hilarious...])
Alot better than Meet the spartans (Isn't that a bit like saying that having sex with a boiling kettle is preferable to having sex with Ann Widdecombe?)
Overall excellent (Oh dear Lord...)
thank you for reading my review (I'll need more than thanks for reading that.)

It's people like these that result in films like Transformers making a shit load of money. A spot of eugenics is in order methinks...*

This will probably be my last post before Christmas, so Merry Christmas loyal followers!

*I would like to clarify that I do not in a any way condone the systematic murder of thick people. But if any 'accident' were to befall Nick Griffin tomorrow I wouldn't exactly be crying myself to sleep...