Friday, 1 October 2010

Shaun of the Dead

Shaun of the Dead
Image via Wikipedia

I liked Shaun of the Dead. Clearly, I was wrong to laugh. I hope someone eats my spleen. Let's read on:
To put it simply, this is one of the worst movies ever made (Actually, I don't think that is a simple thing to say. I'd really like you to qualify it). As a comedy, it never made me laugh, and as a horror movie(It wasn't a horror movie. It just had zombies in it. It wasn't meant to actually be scary), it was just like any other stupid zombie flick. I can't understand why so many people love this film(Clearly). It is unbelievably over-stated. This is not worth even reading about it on the back of the cover at the movie store(Well, time is precious). Don't waste your time; it would be better spent taking a dump. (Seriously? The film's over and hour-and-a-half long. If your bowel movements take that long, you might want to see a doctor...)

I don't know why i'm even wasting time on such a piece of crap(I like it when people summarise their own reviews, saves me time), i guess to set the record straight. First off, if you think that this is or will be better than say the remake of the dawn of the dead, your either retard(Wow, even ignoring the horrible grammar, little offensive there), insane or wanted to like shaun of the dead so much that,COMMA! THERE'S A COMMA HERE! WATCH OUT you had already made up your mind before even watching this film (i too wanted to like this film, being a person that loves zombie films, but also a person that even made one; which didn't turn out to well either(There there)) But i'm still man enough to admit it. I had heard from early on, that this will be the next great zombie movie.(Really? It isn't really a zombie movie though. It's a film with zombies in it) Even a director that put out one of the last good horror movies and a man i greatly respect, Eli Roth "Cabin Fever" loved this film. So when I got a chance to see this film, I was surpised in all respects, it was really bad, I even thought about turning it off.(You think?) I thought at least this film would showcase good fun zombie humor(evil dead movies, braindead aka dead alive) but it would be a insult to even think of them in the same ballpark, even further the same damn sport. I didn't go into the film because there were just to many issues that i had with it(Was it mean to you?). So my friend watch it and determine for yourself(I don't really know you. I don't feel we're friends). All i ask is judge it from your view, not someone else's and you'll see what i'm saying(I did, and I don't know what you're saying). But hell, in the end see the film, just don't buy it first...just rent the damn thing..
I feel bad for the Brits if this is what they give 5 stars.

Bad Movie in every way! (I'll pass on your racially patronising sympathy to the Queen)
A completely horrible and boring movie. I guess I'm supposed
to laugh because it's made by brits.(Yup, otherwise we'll kick your asses like we did in Vietnam. Or something) Afterall, if you don't
find their attempts at drawing cheaps laughs (Are you talking about the whole county's film industry? Because you're just patronizing. If I were so racist, I'd call you an American cunt. But I'm not, so I shan't... You're just a cunt) funny it's because
you don't have any humor or culture. (Yes. And vultures will feast on the eyes of your children. We take our shit very seriously.)

Modern PC america at it's worst. Really? What do you even mean? Do you think lynch-mobs of suited Englishmen roam the countryside, tipping their bowler hats to women and hanging those who don't like 'British' humour?

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